071: Essentialism and The Art Of Letting Go (How You Can Purge Your Closet Today)

Aug 22, 2021

I'm Jamie Coleman, a virtual coach who focuses on helping moms build a line to lifestyle or business that allows them to live without sacrifice. If you're obsessed with finding ways to be more present and ready to make your vision a reality, hit that subscribe button so you never miss another episode, and let's dive in.

I want to start this off with a quote that I recently heard that stood out to me. And it goes like this, we buy things we don't need with money, we don't have to impress people we don't like the Edward Norton. I'm gonna say that again, we buy things we don't need with money, we don't have to impress people we don't like. Okay. Now, the reason this stood out so much, especially in this transitional phase of our life. Is that a lot of times, as entrepreneurs as mothers, we spend all of this time trying to figure out the financial means for our feeling, we want to be able to pay our kids then we want to be by ourselves, things that we want. But what's interesting, the transformation the shift that occurred in my life.

As we packed up from Maui, that we each had two suitcases. In this sad as it was to let go of the world that we had built around us, I mean everything from the TV to our favorite couch, our bedding to even shoes. Hi, go let it all go. And what I realized once we packed up our car and headed to the airport was that everything I needed was inside of that vehicle. It was Stephen, and it was Kylo. It was us. And it was the memories that we had made on that island it wasn't the things we let go of those things that were non-essential to our happiness. But they were just things that we picked up along the way.

Okay. So, what exactly can we learn from this moving forward. Well, I think it begins in the past. Why is it that we were conditioned at such a young age to want things? Now I'm going to go back to my middle school days. Back when everybody was always talking about the next technology. Everybody was looked up to at my school if you had the newest iPhone, or a nice car that you should have in school, or a nice bag that you carry around with you to the mall on the weekends.

And so what I did when I got my first job is rather than using it to propel myself forward, use it for things that would be good for a future even doing fun things going on adventures with that money. Rather, what I did was spend it on material things, and I have to say that's kicking me in the answer right now because now I'm having just get rid of all those things. It taught me at a young age to start being a consumer and to start pulling all of these things into my world, which became a huge problem. Because what happened from there is I ended up having so many things in my life weighing me down to where I needed storage units, I needed, back and forth trips with fans to actually load that storage unit. It just ends up bombarding you and taking your mental Quiddity because there's just clutter in your life. And when there's clutter in your life there's clutter in your mind.

So what happened is I ended up with a storage unit in Nebraska, a storage unit in Florida, and a lot of things in the New Jersey basement, which is a huge problem. So, I'm going to walk through my process of letting go, and how it's felt along this journey, and how you can take some time and start living like the centralist rather than the non-essentialist right now in this transition.

This book Essentialism by Greg may go in has been a lifesaver for me. And it's ironic when you start to listen to yourself book that you need starts to really draw you to it. I had no idea what book I was going to read next. And I really listened to the season that I was in. This book really found me. Ironically, and as I opened it up for the first time yesterday, I realized that it was exactly what I was looking for right now and it was the exact phase that I'm in right now so if you are going through this right now and you feel like it's time to let go and be more of an essentialist I recommend centralism by Greg McMullen.

All right, so I'm going to go through my process of letting go, especially here in New Jersey, because I know a lot of you are not getting ready for a move off of an island where you have to pack your life into two suitcases and I know how easy it is when you don't have to do that to just put something in a storage bin and hold on to it forever because there's a garage right. I get it. I've done that, hence why I have storage units, but after these next two weeks, I will not have storage units anymore because I'm letting go.

Alright, so let's get into that process now, and hopefully, this can help you create some mental space in some clarity in your life as you begin to open up the next realm as an essentialist. So here's what I did, when it came to purging clothes. I literally took all of my clothes and I dumped them out on the floor, which was honestly a little painful, given the fact that everything was rolled really nicely into bits, dump it all out, make a big pile.

And if you guys have not watched Marie Kondo on Netflix, go and watch her because she is the queen at helping you realize what is actually meaningful to you. So make a big pile with everything in it. And then what I did was a categorized everything based on the type of clothing or the specific use. So for example, swimsuits went in one pile nightgowns clothing for bed went one pile of workout clothes and shoes went in one pile. All right, that's how I organized, and then from there, I just choose a pile and then got to work. I started trying things on. If I didn't immediately feel like something wasn't me anymore. It didn't really feel right, immediately I just throw it in a bin that was. But the most fun part was I would look at an item and I'm like, is this a hell yes. And if it wasn't, then it went in the no pile that I revisited at the end of this ordeal to see if I can get rid of it, at that time.

Okay, so, make a big pile with everything in it, categorize it based on the type of clothing or the specific use for the item, and then immediately eliminate the things that are just easy to let go of. After that, ask yourself, Is this a hell yes item, like does it light you up. Do you have a memory, do you feel like I missed this, I totally want to wear this again. Right, and going even deeper, are there things you haven't touched or looked at in two years, you guys. We've been at his house for two years. You haven't seen any of this stuff for two years, and that's probably the case with you too, especially if this stuff has been locked away. So, are you going to miss it? Did you miss it? If you missed it, maybe it goes in that pile where you're like, Oh, yes, I can't wait to read it again, but if it doesn't let you up like that. Donate it, get rid of it because I promise you, the amount of mental space and clarity, you're going to get when you just Trump that stuff off and get it out of your space, it's going to feel amazing, because it makes more room for you to just be able to enjoy what you have and I promise you, it is not essential to keep enough clothing for a miniature army. Like I had.

All right. And what I noticed was very interesting during this time was that I started subconsciously, making a separate pile. This wasn't the fuck yes pile this wasn't the donate pile. This wasn't that. I don't know, you should probably try this on again pile. I subconsciously started making a different pile. That was to go with me to Colorado, which is where we're planning on going next. I subconsciously started packing, which is interesting because if you think about that thing that I was that I really wanted.

So that says anything in the pile that I actually missed. I'm sorry if you don't like cursing but this really was going through my mind, it was in the fuck yes pile that, that I should definitely hold on to it, if it was in the donate pile definitely get rid of it and if it wasn't like the maybe pile. Donate it because I didn't need it. But the stuff that I packed. That was what I would actually use and a lot of times there's a difference there. The stuff that you like, maybe not be the stuff that you use and the stuff that you want to like is stuff that's just gonna keep hanging out in your closet. So this is speaking of clothes, but in reality, this is about anything that you own. Right, I had more than just clothes here, but everything else was much easier to get rid of I didn't even, it wasn't even a question at all when anything that wasn't clothes.

The clothes for me are the hardest to let go of because I bought them for a reason because I wanted to wear them, and then a lot of times it just didn't end up wearing them. I'm the kind of person who will wear the same shirt, or the same outfit all week long, and not even care. Just because I like it, I like to feel comfortable, rather than cute, all the time. So I have many things that I like to wear right, I have my specific five outfits that electro to rotate through all the time so in reality, I am an essentialist when it comes to the clothing wardrobe. It's just very hard for me to let go.

So now, new aim with basically everything that is being done is to focus on the essentialist, which is, instead of thinking, how can I do everything or how can I do more in malady what it is how can I do less, but have it mean more, or have it be better. It says What can I eliminate so that there's space for me to have better to be better and to do better things. It's not you guys it's not adding more close to your closet, to have the best wardrobe. It's removing the things that shouldn't be there so that you can focus on the things that should.

And yes you've guessed it, I'm talking about more than just your closet, and we're going to get into that in the next episode here on mom's freedom Maker podcast so if this episode spoke to you, feel free to rate and review the show on whatever directory you're listening to, or feel free to take a screenshot of you listening to this episode and tag me on Instagram @Jamie Coleman, I would really appreciate it.

I love hearing how these influence you. I'm going to be sharing pictures of my purge before and after, along with all of the things I'm donating on Instagram. So if you want a first-hand seat to watch my purge and watch me step into this next season of my life as an essentialist slash minimalist, I'm getting there. Follow me on Instagram and Join my Freedom Maker Tribe. I'll catch you guys in the next episode.

 

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